Balu was supposed to be a foster dog. Months later, when a family was finally found for him, I realised he had already found his home.
There is a term in dog rescue called a foster fail.
It sounds like something went wrong.
In reality, it means that you take in a dog temporarily, intending to help them find their forever home – and somewhere along the way realise that they have already found it.
That is what happened with Balu.
But I didn’t know it when I first met him.
The Puppy Nobody Wanted
Balu was one of seven puppies from an unwanted litter in Cyprus.
One after another, his siblings found somewhere to go.
Balu was the last one left.
So we drove to Limassol to pick him up.
His parents were living in a small enclosure, a way of keeping dogs that unfortunately isn’t unusual to see in Cyprus.
And Balu wasn’t the happy little puppy who came racing towards us when we arrived.
He was afraid.
He didn’t want to be stroked.
He didn’t want to be picked up.
He didn’t really seem to know what to make of us at all.
When we finally arrived home and opened his transport box, he wouldn’t come out.
So we gave him time.
Snacks Came Before Cuddles
Day by day, Balu became a little braver.
At first, food did most of the convincing.
He started approaching me for snacks.
Then he discovered that the person providing the snacks could apparently also be useful for something else.
Strokes.
Slowly, he began seeking me out even when there wasn’t food involved.
The frightened puppy who wouldn’t leave his box was starting to show us his personality.
And there was quite a lot of personality waiting underneath.
Bonnie and Bailey Had a Few Things to Teach Him
Balu soon met two of our other foster puppies, Bonnie and Bailey.
And Balu had one particularly annoying puppy habit.
He bit.
A lot.
Especially our heels.
Walking around with Balu behind you could quickly turn into a game of trying to protect your ankles.
Luckily, Bonnie and Bailey turned out to be pretty good teachers.
Dogs communicate boundaries with each other in ways that humans simply cannot replicate, and the two older puppies did their share of Balu’s education.
Gradually, the constant heel biting stopped.
Balu was learning how life with other dogs – and humans – worked.
Then the group changed again.
Suddenly, Balu Wasn’t the Baby Anymore
Oscar and Lilo arrived from the shelter.
Until then, Balu had been the little one.
Now there were more puppies.
More personalities.
And more competition for attention.
Balu didn’t particularly like that.
He barked when he felt left out.
He wasn’t enthusiastic about sharing his food bowl.
And in the evening, when it was time for the puppies to settle down in the puppy room, Balu often barked.
A lot.
Eventually I made a decision that was partly about Balu and partly about everyone in the house getting some sleep.
I took him into my bedroom.
It changed everything.
From Anxious Puppy to a Dog Who Could Relax
Away from the excitement of the group, Balu seemed to let go.
The tense, insecure puppy relaxed.
He became happy.
He settled.
He slept beside me.
And before long, Balu hadn’t only made his way into my bed.
He had made his way into my heart.
Still, he was a foster dog.
That was the idea.
My job was to help him grow into a dog who could eventually leave for his own family.
And for months, we waited for that family.
Nothing happened.
Nobody Asked for Balu
Month after month passed without a serious adoption request.
Balu was black, which certainly didn’t seem to make finding him a home any easier.
And while we waited, he simply became more and more part of my everyday life.
He slept beside me.
He knew our routines.
He lived alongside the changing groups of foster puppies coming through our home.
And somewhere during all of this, the line between my foster dog and simply my dog had become increasingly blurry.
I just hadn’t admitted it yet.
Then the message came.
Balu Was Going to England
After months without an adoption, suddenly there was news.
Balu was supposed to go to England.
This was what fostering was for.
A puppy comes to us.
We care for them.
We help them grow.
Someone falls in love with them.
And eventually we say goodbye.
I had done it before.
I would do it many times again.
But this time, I pictured myself taking Balu to the airport.
I pictured handing him over.
I pictured him getting onto the plane and disappearing into a new life without me.
And somewhere underneath all the thoughts about what I was supposed to do, another voice was much clearer:
But he’s my dog.
That was it.
Balu wasn’t going to England.
He was home.
What Is a Foster Fail?
A foster fail is what happens when someone starts out temporarily fostering a rescue animal and ultimately decides to adopt them.
Personally, I am not sure there is much failure involved.
The purpose of fostering is to help a dog reach the place where they belong.
Usually, that means saying goodbye.
Sometimes it means realising that the place they belong is the place they are already sleeping every night.
That doesn’t mean every foster dog should stay.
If I had kept every puppy I fell in love with, I couldn’t continue fostering rescue dogs.
Saying goodbye makes space for the next dog who needs help.
But Balu was different.
Or perhaps our relationship had simply become different.
By the time somebody finally wanted him, I realised I already did.
Should I Adopt My Foster Dog?
There isn’t one answer to this question.
Falling in love with a foster dog does not automatically mean adopting them is the right decision.
You have to consider whether the dog genuinely fits your life, whether you can provide what they need long-term and whether keeping them will affect your ability to continue fostering.
But I also think there are moments when the answer becomes surprisingly simple.
For me, that moment wasn’t when Balu first approached me for a snack.
It wasn’t when he first enjoyed being stroked.
It wasn’t even when I allowed him into my bedroom and watched the anxious puppy finally relax.
It happened months later.
Only when I thought I was about to lose him did I understand what had already happened.
He was mine.
The Foster Puppy Who Stayed
Since Balu, many more puppies have passed through our home and our Puppy Yoga Retreat in Cyprus.
They arrive.
We get attached.
They change.
And eventually, most of them leave for their new families.
Balu doesn’t.
He has watched puppies arrive frightened and leave confident.
He has shared his home with dogs from shelters, unwanted litters and difficult beginnings.
In a way, the puppy who once needed Bonnie and Bailey to teach him how to behave became part of the environment in which the next generation of foster puppies learns how to be dogs.
And whenever people joke about a foster fail being a failure, I only have to look at Balu.
The last puppy nobody wanted ended up being the one I couldn’t give away.
Meet the Rescue Puppies Staying With Us
The puppies at our Puppy Yoga Retreat in Cyprus are foster dogs waiting for their own families.
Some stay only a few weeks. Others need longer.
During that time, they become part of our everyday lives – meeting people, learning from other dogs and showing us more of who they are as they begin to feel safe.
Most eventually leave us for their forever homes.
And yes, saying goodbye can be hard.
But every goodbye creates room for another puppy who needs somewhere to go.
Usually, that’s how fostering works.
Every once in a while, though, one of them stays.
